Top 5 Stupid Things Men Say to Women at a Sports Bar

I realize that men say stupid things to other men at sports bars as well. These are football specific.

1. Have you watched all the Auburn games this year?
Actually, I'm just at the bar with my Auburn friend. He's wearing a white shirt, not indicative of his allegiance. Meanwhile, I'm wearing a UCLA blue shirt, and a UCLA yellow hoodie. It's apparently okay to skip wearing a college t-shirt if you're a man, but if you're a woman, you should probably be wearing a team sweatshirt, hat, and watch. Otherwise you're just here because your guy friend is here.

2. I don't really watch Pac 10 games, they come on too late.
Okay, so you also don't read any sports periodicals, the Coaches' Poll, or any blogs or ESPN online, and have no clue that our teams are good? Didn't hear about the USC-Oregon State game from Thursday? I don't tend to focus on games other than mine and the game of the week, but... I definitely know how to read, and thus I see the other scores scrolling beneath my game every week at the very least.

3. It's a rebuilding year; it was a moral victory you lost by only five points.
Look, of course we're not going to be good this year, I get that. However, I completely reject the notion of moral victories. My team lost and it's okay for me to be disappointed when they do. For some of us, Satuday's game is what we look forward to all week. You're telling me no male ever gets pissed when his team loses a winnable game? Fumbling on the Fresno State 10 with about 4 minutes left and blowing a chance to win SUCKS.

4. You guys are a basketball school, why do you even care about football?
Yes, we've been to the final four the last three years, we are a top basketball school. Got it. I also enjoy watching college football, and expect my team to emerge as a dominant Pac 10 football presence in the next few years. UCLA can and will be good in both. Even if we went out there and got blown out every Saturday, you can bet I'd watch it. Being good at basketball doesn't preclude me from cheering for our football team.

5. I will get out of your seat when you ask politely.
You have got to be kidding me. You're telling me when you sit in a dude's seat at the bar and he comes back and asks you to move, it's okay, but a woman needs to polite it up with please, thank you, and sir? Get out of the bar, remove whatever is up your butt, and act like a normal person. No reason for you to feel threatened by a woman in a sports bar and try to revert to the patriarchy.